Greyspace...

I am sick today. As are many days That the trees bough share no leaves I am sick in this hour As are many hours That the earth toils under human blunder I am sick in this minute As are the slow mourn of minutes That true destiny waits to be revealed - and the dreams of fine goals, earnest resolution, The ignorance of suffrage and idyll delusion For I am sick today But do not let my words deny you... Care not for the trivial The luxury or the pride Care for those in pursuit of lights blessed delight Care for self and diligence- the nurture of others Do not be sick today, nor any day Rest the illness of humanity fallen For the moments of the past have no precedence Yet again the bough will blossom @darkPeach

Illusory is the shape of ripple that is left behind While the unclaimed stand afar and wish its influence to care I watch them, abhor you and dream the power to be wrought from your charm fingers Your magic is a threat, the honesty that challenges the lie of their efforts But the  illusory continue to revel in the sight, it is quite amusing - implicitly; and it feeds the want all the more.

I left a very well paying Corporate career to go back to school and finish my degree..... no, not a Bull Shit degree- although some day's it feels like that. Just for a year I thought. Now that I'm in it-  Can I do it? I am already struggling with the decrease in pay, bringing me right back to my early single mom day's-  but I want it. I want to do more- I want to make even more money. Not for me... I am not a spender for myself ( unless its vinyl records, Doc's , Bands or Mid-Century shit)... no, I want to take care of my family in a huge way. Set them up for total success. I am looking at two more years of struggle.... sigh.

The wet breath of foggy dew licks the back of my ears and stings my eyes. This cold brick bleeds through my shoulder, as I lean against for all that is life in that moment. It is there that I can see it, almost feel the warmth of a 5th story window glow. A yellow-orange harmony...  taunting through a sheer vale of safety. Just one step, two steps- just three steps more... But the frailty beneath my knees gives way to acceptance of cool concrete against my cheek. It is a welcome gift of sharpness to my jumbled thoughts and it is okay, because from this place I can still see the window. Maybe they will see me too this time.

Insomnia day three. The only thing it is good for is writing.

This song and this woman singing it makes me happy and sad all at the same time. I just love it with every ounce of me